...Since we have determined the leading treatment factor, one of the main principles during the main stage is interaction with the patient in a relational context. Those. understanding, awareness and reflection of the psychotherapist’s attitude towards the patient (and vice versa) as a person and his actions/actions during the psychotherapeutic process should become the main topic of the therapeutic dialogue. It is important here to distinguish between the concept of “self-disclosure” in a relational sense and as an element of emotional support. In this case, we are talking about true self-disclosure on the part of the psychotherapist, which stimulates the patient to interact through the context of human relationships, which have enormous healing potential, still little explored. They can be understood as analysis, discussion, transmission of information, emotional communication, and actions/actions of people/members of the psychotherapeutic process in relation to each other. The patient, observing the relational self-disclosure of the psychotherapist, over time independently begins to make attempts to reveal certain aspects of his own relationship to the world around him, to the psychotherapist and its characteristics, and most importantly, to himself within the framework of the psychotherapeutic process. The content of the relationship depends on the characteristics of the patient-psychotherapist pair and the difficulties presented, but the most common topics are issues of trust, aggression and competition between people, the nuances of the relationship between a man and a woman, the need for personal boundaries and shared experiences. The greatest difficulty in implementing self-disclosure, according to our observations, is the insufficient level of initial trust in patients among most practicing psychotherapists, as well as little experience of real relational interaction in life and in the professional sphere. The fact is that relationship psychotherapy requires from the psychotherapist, firstly, a certain courage necessary to clearly and unambiguously convey to the patient his attitude towards him and to withstand the counter-attitude from the patient in his direction, which may contain various experiences . Secondly, it also requires a certain wisdom and personal maturity to do this on time and with the necessary amount of human warmth. Example: a patient of young age and attractive appearance attends psychotherapy at the expense of her mother, who exercises control and unconsciously supports the symptoms of her daughter’s periodic panic attacks. The psychotherapist clearly understands the attractiveness of the patient and can talk to her about it, but at a certain point they come to the main issue - in interaction she shows infantilism, lack of independence, and also shares the details of the psychotherapeutic process with her mother. The psychotherapist shows anger and dissatisfaction, and this must be conveyed to the patient in a timely and correct manner. In addition, it is important to encourage her to respond - an attitude towards the psychotherapist in connection with such a situation, and an integrating attitude towards herself. However, the cognitive and emotional levels alone are not enough without behavioral integration into the here-and-now. That is why in relationship psychotherapy, in this case, it is permissible for the psychotherapist to demand that the boundaries of psychotherapy be respected, or even to change the financial obligations between the participants in the process (payment for psychotherapy by the patient herself); in case of refusal, the patient must again hear the psychotherapist’s attitude towards herself and this situation. It is clear that, ideally, the patient’s transition to a more independent life, starting with payment for psychotherapy, will be therapeutic in relation to both infantilism and neurotic symptoms. And the difficulty will lie in the timeliness of such confrontation, its quality, and the ability of the psychotherapist to defend his own position in relation to the situation with sufficient care for the patient and her family. Of course, the life experience of the psychotherapist is very important here,since we are talking about ways of family interaction in life. The natural question is whether the indulgent position of a psychotherapist is acceptable for an unlimited amount of time in psychotherapy? As in life, in relationship psychotherapy any scenario is possible. The author believes that each issue can have its own decision and choice, but it is important that they reflect a person’s living experience and are accompanied by his full involvement in the process. Moral and value-based guiding guidelines can be the provisions reflected in the first chapter of the book, as well as internal subjective criteria (“voice of conscience”) present in any person without exception. On the practical side, it is important to communicate to the patient not only the psychotherapist’s attitude towards him, but also the transfer of a holistic state during the psychotherapeutic process (emotional, level of bodily sensations, metaphor, symbolism, etc.). This echoes the analytical concepts of countertransference, which are useful to know and partly use in practical work, but without relying on it as the only correct concept, because we are in the real world of human relations and relationships. Priority remains with the concepts of the integrity of the response, as well as when describing the relationship itself in V.N. Myasishchev. Countertransference: Consistent (concordant): The therapist empathically experiences the emotional state of the patient. Therapist action: do you feel it too? Complementary: The therapist empathically experiences the emotional state of some significant person in the patient's life. Therapist's action: do people close to you also experience this? The principles of countertransference analysis described in the analytical literature poorly reflect real psychotherapeutic practice (at least in the domestic tradition), reminiscent of a technical description for servicing a car or other unit. For example, “the therapist has a responsibility not to take the feelings expressed by the patient personally.” Also, when working with such reactions, analysts set a number of very specific tasks (“to diagnose the “I”, “split” images of the “I” and objects through the connection of transference with countertransference”, etc.), so we will limit ourselves to a brief concept of countertransference and the relational part of interaction with the patient during his analysis. Understanding parallel processes (more in the section on supervision) and the dynamic concept of transference, and especially practical approaches to working with them, helps to better cope with the necessary cognitive side of relational therapy and achieve realizations that are important for many patients. It should be noted that our knowledge about the possibility and inclination of a person to build similar relationships with different people based on existing patterns, inclinations and habits, etc., is only helpful in the main task - to build relationships with the patient that will become therapeutic for him. . This significantly distinguishes relationship psychotherapy from psychoanalytic approaches, where the analysis is based on achieving the transference neurosis and working through it. In practice, the psychotherapist uses any manifestations of the relationship between him and the patient (in the language of relational psychotherapists - “with all his might he pulls the patient into the relationship”). These can be words, actions, actions towards each other, disagreement or agreement, emotions and feelings, “small” events around. A frequent option is to overcome the feeling of being “excluded” by the psychotherapist (and the patient too) from the process by assigning rigid roles to each other (“you’re a doctor, how can I feel something for you?”). Sometimes, depending on the characteristics of the couple, the other side of “switching off” arises: difficulties with boundaries (“although only two hours have passed, but feelings are already off the charts”), this requires considerable patience on the part of the psychotherapist. Real overcoming is quite difficult from an emotional point of view for both, and requires a certain courage; after it the process moves on.