From the author: What do you think about when you wake up? Surely, about matters and worries that seemed to be waiting for you near the bed. You need to do this, go there, talk to that person, and call that person, and the apartment is a mess, the child has gotten out of hand, and you want to rest so bad, you have no strength. From these thoughts, a feeling of melancholy arises, and the energy to do something decreases. And then you think: since these things are in your life, it means they should be. You are an adult, which means that you took on only as much as you could bear. This is your responsibility, this is what you “should” do. And if it’s “necessary,” then why think about it. Isn't it better to turn off negative thoughts? And you turn it off. Once. Another. Third: What do you think about when you wake up? Surely, about the affairs and worries that seemed to be waiting for you near the bed. You need to do this, go there, talk to that person, and call that person, and the apartment is a mess, the child has gotten out of hand, and you want to rest so bad, you have no strength. From these thoughts, a feeling of melancholy arises, and the energy to do something decreases. And then you think: since these things are in your life, it means they should be. You are an adult, which means that you took on only as much as you could bear. This is your responsibility, this is what you “should” do. And if it’s “necessary,” then why think about it. Isn't it better to turn off negative thoughts? And you turn it off. Once. Another. Third. Until one day you suddenly discover that you hate life. Let's rewind back to the moment when it was important not to brush aside unpleasant feelings, but to come into contact with them and live them carefully. Of course, it seems to you that you feel your feelings, but here I have to disappoint you. You are confusing feeling and reacting. In most cases, we do not have time to realize the feeling and immediately turn it into action. For example, during a telephone conversation with mom, many begin to scream, get angry, and hang up. What if you don’t do this, but just become aware of your anger. At the moment of his consciousness, one should ask the question: I get angry when mom says such and such. Next, ask yourself: What is it about what my mother says that makes me angry? What do my mother’s words even mean to me? As a rule, here you can reach a new level of understanding of your reactions that arise in the context of your relationship with your mother. It turns out that you either feel guilty before your mother for not being able to help her or be with her enough, or you feel powerless and misunderstanding of your mother’s reactions: she complains about something, and for you this means that you have to somehow... then save her from her feelings. Next, it is important to realize what your relationship with your mother really needs at the current moment. Do you really need to do something now or is it enough to listen and express understanding? If you try, you may not succeed the first time. The motives for the emergence of our emotions are not always clear, and it is also quite difficult to immediately change from the usual rails, notice your feelings and not rush to react to them immediately. Just try to be in contact with them and give them the opportunity to turn around and show you your model of perceiving the current situation. This helps in all relationships with parents, with partners, with children, and even with inanimate objects that we hit and often break. Practices are a good help in becoming aware of your feelings and coming into contact with them. They shift your attention, relax you physically and mentally. You begin to see horizons and possibilities. It turns out that you shouldn’t wait for the evening or the weekend to feel the fullness of life. Do you live to sort out the daily routine of affairs? I don't think so. Routine is a necessity, but even in it you can find pleasant things. Little funny, meaningless things. But while you are tense, gloomy and dejected, this is out of the question. Practice will help you consciously come into contact with feelings of relaxation, relieve tension, smooth out wrinkles on the forehead and relieve muscle tension, and then.