From the author: Written for the magazine Krokha and Me, July 2015. Strong connection About how the psychological state of a pregnant woman affects her unborn child It would be strange to say that a child’s life begins only from the moment he is born; in fact, its existence begins much earlier - from its intrauterine development, from the moment of the birth of a new life inside the mother’s body. The mother begins to feel the child and talk to him long before his birth, often from the moment she learns about her pregnancy. We can say that for a child, the mother during pregnancy is the Universe in which he develops and grows. The child gets to know the world around him through communication and interaction with his mother. The child perceives the first tastes and smells through the amniotic fluid - fetal fluid, and receives the first experience of touch and touch through touching the walls of the uterus. The first experience of emotional states, so far at the level of physiological reactions, is also what the child receives during the period of intrauterine development. If the mother experiences any emotions, they are transmitted to the baby. There are ultrasound diagnostic studies that show how babies repeat their mother’s emotions - if the mother is happy, the baby smiles. If the mother is scared, the baby also begins to wince and become nervous. This is explained by the fact that the placenta, which protects the baby from harmful influences, does not protect him from the action of maternal hormones, which include stress hormones - adrenaline, cortisol. So, if the expectant mother is frightened, she begins to produce adrenaline, her pulse becomes more frequent - and along with it, the baby’s pulse also increases. But if the mother’s condition returns to normal, as soon as she realizes that there is no danger and there is nothing to be afraid of, then the baby needs much more time to “come to his senses.” It is no coincidence that from time immemorial, different nations have had customs that were aimed at imbuing a pregnant woman with positive emotions. She was supposed to look only at beautiful things and surround herself only with beautiful people, listen to music, dance, sing. They gave her gifts and prepared special dishes. In some cultures, it was customary to retire during pregnancy to special houses for pregnant women, where the woman lived and prepared for motherhood. Modern research confirms what our ancestors guessed - there is a clear relationship between the emotional state of a pregnant woman and how her pregnancy and childbirth will proceed, as well as the future character and health of the baby. That’s why it’s so important at the moment when a woman finds out about her pregnancy to accept it and be happy about the baby. How often does a woman, seeing two stripes, think: “Oh, how inappropriate... I haven’t had time to go on vacation yet/make repairs/defend my dissertation, etc. d." Pregnancy, even if it was planned, very often turns out to be “inopportune”. It turns out that the woman had many plans for the near future that she wanted to implement. But nature took care of how to moderate the “Napoleonic” plans of the expectant mother and adjust her body to bear a child. The neocortex, the part of the brain responsible for rational thinking, becomes less active during pregnancy. A woman in the first trimester of pregnancy may experience lethargy, drowsiness, fatigue; she often wants to rest and be passive. Nature gives a woman the opportunity to adapt to serious changes that begin to occur in her body - restructuring of the hormonal system, an increase in blood volume, and the development of pregnancy. That is why in the early stages there are so many risks to which the child is exposed - the female body is still just adjusting to motherhood, and the child’s development is already in full swing. By the way, the development of the baby’s nervous system continues throughout pregnancy, although already at the 12th week of pregnancy itsphysiological basis. At the same time, the primary structures of the brain, which include the cerebellum, pituitary gland and hypothalamus, begin to work more actively. They control the body's hormonal and immune systems. The expectant mother begins to smell smells more acutely, taste becomes more acute, taste preferences change - a fairly common picture: a pregnant woman suddenly ceases to tolerate the smells of raw fish, meat, tobacco, which she previously treated calmly. The woman becomes more sensitive, emotional, and often tearful. Such heightened feelings will help her, when the child is born, to establish an empathic connection with him - to respond sensitively to the emerging needs of the baby, understanding him without words, by emotional and bodily reactions. The entire period of the baby’s intrauterine development is the foundation of a person’s relationship with his mother, and through her with the world . A woman’s acceptance of her pregnancy for a child means that he is needed here, he is supported, loved, and expected. For a person, this is an experience of unconditional acceptance and unconditional love, with which the child is imbued with before the moment of birth and gives him the strength to go through the difficult trials that await him in childbirth. He has something to fight for, he has someone to come to at birth. A woman who rejects, denies her pregnancy conveys a different message - I don’t need you. The world is rejecting you. You're lonely. Such a mother does not allow the child to feel maternal love. At the physiological level, an anxious, embittered or fearful pregnant woman in her hormonal background does not provide the baby with a sufficient sense of love and security. Such children, and subsequently adults, often experience a feeling of lack of love and attention in their lives; they have no trust in the world they have come into, no desire to establish emotional connections, and a fear of intimacy. They often limit themselves to strict limits. Here are the study data from the Primary Health Database of the M. Oden Institute: In the Czech Republic, scientists observed 220 children born to mothers who, in the period from 1961 to 1963, abortion was denied both during the first and second applications (the control group included children from wanted pregnancies). Children in the compared groups differed markedly at the age of 9 years, 14-16 years, from 21 to 23 years and at 30 years of age. For example, the academic achievements of 9-year-old children in the study group were significantly lower than those of children in the control group (although IQs were the same in both groups). Between the ages of 21 and 23, the study group had twice as many convictions. A particular manifestation of pregnancy aversion is the worry that a woman is expecting a child of the wrong gender. This is also a condition that can cause certain negative reactions towards the baby from the expectant mother. Of course the child will feel it. It is important to understand and accept the fact of what the child’s gender will be in order to raise him without distortions, i.e. without dressing up a boy in bows or taking a girl to a boxing class. In the overall picture, all these are manifestations of a single message that comes from the mother - I don’t need you. A woman who begins to love and unconditionally accepts her baby even before birth, thereby forms his positive attitude towards the surrounding reality, because for a child, the mother will remain the embodiment of the world as a whole for a long time. Not only the woman, but also her members adapt to pregnancy families. Often for a married couple, the period of pregnancy is a period of restructuring of lifestyle and internal relationships. It is important for family members to understand that emotional manifestations, changes in a woman’s behavior, and changes in her lifestyle are not whims associated with her condition, but serious changes occurring in her body. A woman in a family should learn to express her needs without fear or embarrassment. Don’t forget that you are now not just a wife, daughter or daughter-in-law, you are a woman bearing a child. And your baby’s physical health largely depends on your psychological state. Moreover, during the periodDuring pregnancy, relatives, as a rule, become more attentive to the woman. It is important to surround yourself with care, attention, and the positive attitude of the people around you. Sometimes a woman may have the feeling that she is left alone with her experiences and feelings during pregnancy. Her life has now changed a lot, but with her loved ones, with her husband, everything is still the same as always. There may be some tension and misunderstanding between the spouses. In the later stages of pregnancy, a woman may experience a feeling of fatigue in addition to these sensations. It is important not to suppress your feelings. A woman really needs support from her loved ones - their understanding that the life of all family members with the birth of a baby will undergo serious changes, and their readiness to begin these changes. Often, it is difficult for a woman to understand the situation from the inside. She begins to walk in a circle of negative emotions: shame-guilt-fear. In this case, it is important to find a person who could listen to her objectively, stay close to her, support her, and reassure her. This could be a relative, a psychologist, or even a antenatal clinic doctor, if a confidential dialogue has been established with him. We need a person who would say: “The main thing now is to accept the situation and understand how you can change it in such a way that it does not bring such vivid negative experiences, because your baby is developing against their background.” A woman’s views in a pregnancy situation can be overly emotional and, having calmed down and received support, she begins to understand that she can cope with her experiences and begins to look at her relationship with her husband differently. If a stressful situation arises, the body instantly reacts to this; changes occur in a variety of its systems. It is known that even a person’s blood formula changes under stress. The same goes for the expectant mother: if she experiences strong negative emotions, this also affects the baby’s condition. In a situation of anxiety or fear, a woman’s body begins to actively produce adrenaline. A child whose mother is stressed also experiences stress. His heartbeat quickens, in addition to this, a state of anxiety may also be mixed with a state of physical and tactile discomfort - after all, when the mother is anxious, this can cause uterine tone - a state of tension, spasms of the muscles of the uterus. Instead of relaxed, soft and affectionate touches, the baby begins to feel harsh pressure and compression, which can increase his anxiety. Another negative effect of adrenaline is that when it is produced, the hormone oxytocin, which is very important during childbirth, ceases to be produced. Oxytocin is considered the hormone of joy, happiness and love. It helps to more easily endure pain during labor pains. It has been noticed that mothers with high levels of oxytocin in the blood are more open to their children, more tender and caring. During the birth of a baby, the level of oxytocin in the mother’s blood is so high that the air around her is literally saturated with it. Often at the moment of the birth of a baby, everyone present experiences a surge of inspiration and joy. The production of oxytocin by the mother’s body is the main condition for a successful, easy birth for mother and baby, as well as a guarantee of the emergence of a strong, stable emotional attachment between mother and baby, as one of the important elements of the child’s future mental health. Therefore, repeating myself, let me remind you how important it is to make an informed choice of a doctor and the place where the birth will take place, because At this moment, an atmosphere of respect, trust and support from those around her is very important for a woman. But if adrenaline is a “situational” hormone: its level increases sharply, but then also decreases sharply, then the effect of cortisol remains in the body for a longer time. Cortisol is a hormone that is produced in a state of prolonged anxiety, anxiety, and depression. The hormone causes inhibition and depression of the nervous system; its increased concentration in the blood can lead to the development of depressive conditions. Cortisol is dangerous because it can negatively affectphysical condition of the child. “By treating the birth of a child as an illness, the obstetrician makes his intervention inevitable,” the American pediatrician Robert S. Mendelson once wrote. Pregnancy is a normal physiological state of a woman. Naturally, approaching pregnancy and future childbirth with full responsibility, a woman turns for help to specialists - obstetricians and gynecologists. How to make your choice consciously? When should you think about changing your doctor? If the doctor looks at pregnancy as a disease state that needs to be constantly examined or treated, talks a lot and at length about complications, makes far-reaching conclusions about the woman’s current condition or gives negative forecasts, demands strict adherence to rules and regulations, is rude, and intimidates the woman. When communicating with a doctor, learn to listen to yourself and monitor your negative emotions. For example, you went to the doctor, he measured your blood pressure and said: “Your blood pressure is high!” - and you are already beginning to feel fear that something is wrong with you and the child. Or you step on the scale and the doctor says, “You've gained too much in the last week,” and you immediately start blaming yourself for eating too much. If you feel that there are more and more such negative emotions, a feeling of fear before the appointment arises, your physical condition worsens - the pressure increases or the tone of the uterus occurs, if you do not find mutual understanding with the doctor, look for another specialist. Moreover, it is not necessary to go to a paid clinic. You have every right to change the doctor at the antenatal clinic if for some reason you don’t like the doctor who is observing your pregnancy. You always have a choice. Do not forget that your physiological state is closely interconnected with your emotional one, and if you experience discomfort when communicating with a doctor, find someone else you can trust and with whom you will feel calm and natural. During pregnancy, you need to carefully consider the choice of your social circle . Having learned that a woman is pregnant, many relatives, friends, and acquaintances begin to take an interest in her condition, give advice, and recall incidents from their own lives. Some may do a mother-to-be a disservice if they have had a negative pregnancy experience. Pregnant women are easily suggestible, psychologically more vulnerable and impressionable. Such stories about a negative pregnancy experience or a difficult, complicated birth can have a bad impact on the psychological state of the expectant mother, and she begins to feel a sense of fear: “Oh, what if this happens to me too?” It is better to limit such communication and learn to filter information - it is not at all necessary that what happened to someone from your environment will certainly happen to you. There is also no need to mindlessly read forums about childbirth on the Internet - women who have given birth happily and easily usually write little and without details: “Hurray, I gave birth, thanks to all the doctors...”, but people who need to talk it out and get rid of worries usually describe the situation in detail . Such readings can, on the contrary, undermine emotional stability and a positive attitude, and increase fear. At the same time, positively-minded friends and relatives can provide support, especially if they themselves have successfully become mothers, have a positive attitude towards motherhood and have practical experience. In Rus' there was a custom: shortly before giving birth, at 39-40 weeks, a midwife and women who had already given birth gathered in the house of a woman who was about to give birth and they wished the expectant mother a pleasant birth. This was accompanied by certain rituals, weaving wreaths, brewing herbal teas, etc. Thus, the woman received a positive attitude towards the upcoming birth. Nowadays, these traditions are being revived, midwives are beginning to adopt the experience of our ancestors and use in their work the practices that midwives used to prepare for childbirth and postpartum recovery. Very useful for the futuremothers courses on preparation for childbirth. There she will receive information about the physiology of pregnancy, proper nutrition, and a healthy lifestyle, as well as how childbirth proceeds. The courses will tell you how to alleviate the pain of contractions using various postures during childbirth, teach you how to breathe correctly during contractions and pushing, and how to relax in the intervals between contractions. The expectant mother will communicate with other women expecting a child, will be able to receive support and attention, and the feeling that she is not alone in this condition. This kind of communication puts women in a positive mood, gives them self-confidence, affects their emotional state and reduces anxiety and depression. It is important for a pregnant woman to choose in advance the doctor and the maternity hospital where she is going to give birth (don’t forget, you also have a choice here!) . It is better to get to know the doctor in advance. You can invite a doula with you to the birth - a woman who is nearby during childbirth and helps the expectant mother, supports her at this difficult moment. Tips for the expectant mother: + Be sure to take daily walks - this helps stabilize the emotional state and good for both you and your baby.+ Pamper yourself with delicious food. Some studies suggest that depressive disorders, such as anxiety and sleep disorders, may be worsened by poor diet. Particularly when there is a lack of omega-3 fatty acids (such a deficiency likely reduces maternal serotonin levels during critical periods of fetal neurodevelopment. Michel Auden, the famous French obstetrician-gynecologist, jokes about this: “In the future, the leitmotif of prenatal care will be a simple rule of thumb: “Eat sardines, rejoice and... sing!” The diet must include fish and seafood, fresh, simple food rich in vitamins - seasonal fruits and vegetables, herbs, nuts, unrefined oils (olive, flaxseed, for example) - everything. this is necessary for the normal functioning of the nervous system. Find the best option for physical activity - it could be swimming or yoga, gymnastics for pregnant women or dance practices, as well as vocals, relaxation and meditation practices - all this has a positive effect on the entire body as a whole and on the nervous system in particular. Often, an expectant mother, gaining weight, is afraid that after giving birth she will not be able to lose weight and regain her previous shape, and worries that she will no longer be attractive to her husband. You need to understand that these changes are temporary, and that the main thing now is that the baby develops normally. Women who do not give up physical activity during pregnancy quickly return to their original shape. After giving birth and finishing breastfeeding, you can take matters into your own hands. The main thing is to act now, and not sit on the couch with a sandwich and lament the extra pounds you have gained. After the end of lactation, you can go on a diet, find something you like - join a fitness club or dance club, go to the pool, visit the bathhouse or sauna. Again, let's not forget about the postpartum recovery practices that midwives have. With this lifestyle, your figure will soon become slim again. It is worth remembering that young mothers definitely need to find at least a little time for themselves. After all, we now know that a healthy, active, joyful mother is a guarantor of the child’s psychological stability. Some women experience constant anxiety due to bad previous experiences. It is possible that the previous pregnancy ended in miscarriage or death of the fetus, and the woman, having become pregnant again, is worried that this may happen again. The situation of loss is a very serious emotional state that requires some time, during which a person must grieve and let go, be consoled. It is important to learn to separate one experience from another. It happens that a person, having gone through serious trials, does not fully experience them, and the experiences return again. It turns out that the previous situation was not lived through, not accepted, the person is stillgrieving, suffering, experiencing loss, as if frozen in his feelings, his experience. Then you need the help of a specialist - a psychotherapist. He will help you accept and let go of this situation. This is important so that the next pregnancy proceeds more stable from a physiological and psychological point of view. We need to understand that any grief or suffering experienced leaves an imprint on our future life. Therefore, how the mother coped with her experiences, whether she really sees her child in front of her, or is still grieving over the past, will influence the psychological climate in the family and the condition of the baby. In the case when the mother hangs in the past, the child feels it very much, he perceives her grief and emotional coldness as a message - I don’t need you. And this message is very clearly understood, including on a physical level, by children. The reaction to this may be anxiety on the part of the baby and breast refusal and hyperactivity. Subsequently, such children may be emotionally closed - distrustful, withdrawn, capricious, demanding, anxious. To prevent this from happening, you need to very clearly distinguish between two completely different experiences - the previous pregnancy, the past, and what is happening here, now, realizing that this baby is different, loved, desired. Here is another study from the Primary Health Database M. Odena: In Finland, they studied the effects of grief after bereavement. 167 children were identified whose fathers died before they were born. The scientists also selected the stories of 168 children whose fathers died during the first year of their lives. Next, all 335 medical records of study participants were studied until they reached the age of 35 years. Most of the fathers of these children died during World War II. In both groups, the age and social status of the parents were approximately the same. All these children grew up without fathers, but only children whose fathers died before they were born had an increased tendency to commit crimes, alcoholism and mental illness.” . The results of this study suggest that the mother's emotional state during pregnancy results in more long-term consequences for the child than her state in the first year of the baby's life. It is necessary to distinguish between fear and anxiety - these are different conditions. A person is afraid of something specific, which has a name, and it is easier for specialists to work with this, because there is a specific figure. If a woman understands what exactly she is afraid of, she herself or with the help of specialists can learn to cope with this fear and understand how to deal with it. Fears can affect the mother's relationship with the baby. If this is the mother’s fear for the baby’s health, you can try to understand what it is based on. Maybe the doctor who managed the pregnancy or delivered the baby was overly concerned about the condition of the expectant mother and child. And, then, in this case, is this anxiety justified, because later this can develop into constant research and examination of the child for the mother. In this sense, it is worth focusing on the current state of health of the mother and child. Or this is a common experience of a pregnant woman - her belly is growing and everyone wants to touch it; many mothers are afraid that the child will be jinxed. The mother’s fears can affect the baby’s condition by increasing the heartbeat or anxiety, so no matter what fear the mother has, it is imperative to take care of how stable the mother’s condition is at this moment. If fears cause panic or anxiety, it is better to talk about this with a specialist. It must be said that fear itself is a normal human state. This is a protective function of our body - it warns us of the danger that threatens us. It arises as a reaction to certain situations. You can learn to deal with it. For example, if a woman is afraid of pain during childbirth, she should pay attention to training courses where she will be taught proper breathing, self-massage and relaxation techniques between contractions. All this is aimed at making the sensations during childbirth softer and developing skills.