In my article about the Victim of the Tyrant and the Rescuer, I only outlined those roles that sometimes control our lives and the (unsatisfied) needs that lie behind them. I propose to take a closer look at them, to understand how this mechanism, or law, works in our psyche. So. For various and still unknown reasons (which are understood during therapy), the child begins to live his life in the role of a VICTIM. Now imagine that you are the director of a film and you are the author of the script. Sketch out what this role will look like in your film, what events you will include there, so that the audience feels sooo sorry for the hero and so that no one doubts that this is a victim. Introduced? He will get sick in all sorts of ways, get into unpleasant situations, attract scoundrels... And the most interesting thing is that this nightmare cannot end. According to the law of the genre. If it's the role of the victim, then it's the role of the victim. If a person is tired of living like this, he needs to change the role and scenario. (you need to move) Why doesn’t a person give up this role as an adult? Try to become a spectator for a while. As a viewer, you always sympathize with the victim, the participants in the film help the victim, feel sorry for her, save her, while the victim herself does nothing, in general there are many hidden advantages to this role... There is another advantage to our journey with you - diagnostic, if you are starting to get annoyed This state of affairs (Victim) means your inner TYRAN has turned on, and if you rush to help the VICTIM and solve its problems, then we are on the way to the SAVIOR. Well, shall we continue? So, if you or your child have chosen the role of RESCUE. What will the scenario be? Of course, this hero will always look for those who need to be saved, without them this role loses its meaning. In fact, his whole life will come down to solving other people’s problems, the problems of friends, relatives, acquaintances... If this is an elderly grandmother (and this also happens) She will give advice, in large quantities and sometimes even when they don’t ask for it... But what about him? - then life? This question will be best answered by your closest ones. What is the advantage of this role? I think there is no need to list here, you can give an example yourself. But I will write a minus that is not the most obvious. Unfortunately, when such a rescuer does not find a use for himself in society, he creates the situation himself, in his own home (unconsciously, of course), that is, there must be a Victim in the house. And then we see mothers or fathers who save their children through life, because children always love their mothers very much and really need their love. Children really want their mother to be happy. Well, let's move on. TYRAN, EXECUTIONER. This role is always active. In any case, he is a man of action, and he does things clearly, always brings them to the end and is successful. Yes, yes, tough, decisive, does not take into account “snot”, takes responsibility, sometimes a lot of responsibility and... You can continue yourself. What's the catch, the minus? There are always those who got in his way and didn’t have time to jump away. There are always those who are offended and passed over at the turn. There is envy and reproach from others, excessive responsibility and GUILTY... If someone recognized themselves, I sincerely congratulate you! Is it true. Psychological defenses will not allow everyone to realize this. Once you recognize yourself, decide whether you like your role. After all, as I already said, you are both the scriptwriter and the director. You have the right to choose any road, get out of this triangle and write your own script for the Traveler, the Beautiful Princess or the Winner... Everything can be changed, maybe not the first time, but we also learned to walk and write gradually. From practice I will add that it is easier for Tyrants and Rescuers to change simply because these roles are active and these people are active. The victim is passive, manipulative, and here you need to work with open responsibility. We can choose any path when we realize where we are now and in what capacity. In life, a lot depends on our AWARENESS. I wish you good luck.