About polarities. If we imagine that we and our mental component are some kind of continuum, then at both its poles we can place different things that are so different and different from each other. These are, for example, aggressiveness and tenderness, love and hatred, life according to a strictly routine order or creative adaptation to the situation and spontaneity. There are a huge number of such examples. To do this, it is enough to remember some quality of ours that we really value in ourselves, or vice versa, which is very annoying in my colleague. Take your answer to a question like this and look at its opposite - that's the continuum I talk about at the beginning. All this is called the phenomenon of polarities. This phenomenon is not only inside, but also around us. Walk down some nook and cranny. Very soon, trees and other wonderful plants will begin to come to life and exude wonderful aromas, the air will be filled with warmth and a pleasant wind, but right there, on the other side of the street or a couple of meters from this beauty: a lot of dirt, slush and surprises left by dog ​​lovers and their furry friends . The beautiful and the disgusting are nearby! Thus, polarities are extremes of behavior, opposite and conflicting ways of life, between which a person is trying to decide or rushing about. But what is the problem then? The difficulty arises in a situation when I try to forever choose or decide on any polarity. I can do this consciously, or I can unconsciously defend only one side or simply get stuck in it. This process of getting stuck in one of the sides makes us limited in choice, reaction and in life in general. The Gestalt approach strives for the harmonious unity of all complementary extremes of human behavior, but in no case to abandon one in favor of the other. “I” I love my wife so much that I can’t even imagine that I can be angry with her” - when I hear such phrases, an expression of distrust and suspicion appears on my face: is there a place for the second part of the human personality in these relationships? Is there somewhere to deploy the energy that anger gives us, in order, for example, to defend broken boundaries or move to a new, higher stage of relationships and generally advance in development? “I am a responsible and decent person,” a client who suffers from busy at work, who responsibly and very decently fulfills the duty plan prescribed for her, without sleep and without devoting time to herself and her favorite things, because this is “so irresponsible.” The secret of harmony and relief is that I am not some time and forever. Every time I choose how I should be “here and now,” because I have everything necessary to make the most appropriate choice for the situation. Why is it important? If we always choose only one polarity, then the other, alienated and not accepted by us, part of the psyche goes into the unconscious and from there begins to bother us with phobias, strange dreams and other unpleasant symptoms.